Many people perceive bondage to be kinky games of whips, chains, punishment and pain, but like most sexual pursuits you can take as much or as little as you wish.

In its simplest form, bondage can be holding someone's hands down whilst giving them a lap dance. In this situation there are no restraints at all. Bondage is more about the eroticism of being under the control of another person or the eroticism of having full control over someone else.

Because of this, bondage on any level stimulates the largest sex organ in the body - The Brain. Bondage binds the brain in rules that give the brain the illusion that the body is being restrained and controlled by someone else. It is usually considered that people in high powered jobs like these kind of sexual games, because they are able to let someone else take control so that they can loose control. But it is also fair to say that it is usually imaginative people who enjoy these games, because they are able to get lost inside the game.

Anyone considering practising bondage on any level must have complete trust in the person or persons who they intend to play with. It is also essential that everyone agrees on a 'safety' word. The safety word is a word that can be used by anyone to stop all activity immediately. The word could be a television programme, a musician, or complete nonsense such as 'erotic elephants'. Whatever your safety word, it must only be used when you want to stop all activities and return to reality. It is important to be able to stop the game because someone my get hurt or injured.

Also for safety, don't tie anyone too tight. During sexual arousal your body slightly swells, so a tight handcuff soon starts cutting off the bloody supply.

For the novice, bondage can be a quick and inexpensive way to spice up your sex life. You don't need to buy any sort of specialised kit. Neck ties, stocking and belts make ideal bonds. Use soft items to bind your lover to avoid chafing.

Of course there is more to bondage than just tying your partner down to the bed. What are you going to do with them now that you have them there? This is why it is perceived that spanking and whipping must be involved. If you like that kind of thing there are a wide selection of Spanking Tools available, however this is sadism and masochism activity.

Other less brutal activities could involve teasing your partner.

Tips for girls -

Rub your pussy very lightly over his cock whilst rubbing baby oil into your breasts. Lean forward every now and then and let your juicy orbs hang in his face, just out of tongue reach.

Kneel above his chest and masturbate giving him a ringside seat. Rub your fingers over your lips and then go in for the full on snog.

A little forced face sitting, hover the bits of your pussy you want licking over his face.

Tips for the boys -

Get her to stick her tongue out and the stroke her face and neck and tongue with your erection.

Kiss and caress the inside of her thighs slowly, forever moving upwards little by little. Keep your hands moving and occasionally run your hand over her pussy, but don't linger or give her any sort of satisfaction. Make sure she feels your breathe on her clit, but not your tongue! Not yet anyway.

The games and the teasing all adds to the excitement of bondage sex. The slow build up leads to steamy passionate sex.

After dabbling with bondage you may want to move up a level. This is a great excuse to dress up, whether you dress up as a Dominatrix, or a Submissive Sex Slave or the Devil herself; the key ingredient has to be PVC or Leather.

Top Tip - If you dress kinky and sexy, you feel kinky and sexy.

You may also want to upgrade your bondage restraints

Hand Cuffs - Cold metal feels nice against your skin, however, they do clank and make noise and they can scratch your furnishings, metal beds in particular. Leather Wrist Restraints - The feel of leather and the look and smell of it is very sexy. Just be aware that leather collars and cuffs do take some 'wearing in' because new leather is rather stiff. Fabric Wrist Restraints - Very comfortable to wear with padded protection. Quick and easy to use, you can tie someone up in the blink of an eye. They don't damage your bed and are compatible with any kinky inflatable furniture. Fabric binds are easily washed in the washing machine. However, their sex appeal isn't the greatest.

PVC Bondage Tape - Bondage tape is wonderful stuff. It works in a similar way to Clingfilm so it sticks but not with stickiness, so you can wrap it round your head and it doesn't scalp you as you take it off. Its quick and easy to use and looks very hot, although you can't reuse really because the tape stretches and goes funny and doesn't look as sexy the next time you use it.

Of course, restraints aren't just designed to tie your lover to the bed. Some restraints are designed so that they connect together, usually with 'D' ring (named after their shape). By clipping bondage items together, you can create unusual sex positions that need support, or just hold limbs out of the way for easier access. Cuff her ankles to her wrists, lay her on her back with her legs straight and you have easier access for giving oral and it leaves your hands free for other naughtiness. The alternative is to buy your collars and cuffs separately. To ooze sex appeal here you really need to go to a specialised retailer and get sexy leather.

3-Ring Slave Collar - Not only do these collars make the wearer look really hot but they are also very versatile. They enable you to cuff hands to neck in front or behind of the wearer, or ankles to neck (obviously not so that it breaks the wearers hips). You can also add a lead for a bit of fun or use the third 'D' ring to tie them to the bed. Great fun. Waist Cuff, Bondage Belt - Bondage belts allow you to tie your lovers hands to their waist, either at their sides or directly in-front or behind them, again with a long piece of rope you could also attach their ankles so that their legs are in the air and spread open. They can also be used to with a piece of rope going from centre front to centre back to form a kind of chastity belt, or to keep a vibrator firmly inside the vagina. Leather and Steel Restraints - Ankle to wrist restraints are great for deep penetration sex. Cuff her up and then roll her backwards so that her weight rests on her shoulder blades. Tie the Cuffs to the bed to hold and maintain the position. Inflatable Bondage Chair - Kinky Furniture is the ultimate bondage toy. However, Bondage furniture usually takes up a lot of space and is not easily hidden when out of use. Inflatable bondage furniture on the other hand easily packs away and can be hidden in the wardrobe - a little less sex appeal but saves the kids and your mother from seeing the evidence of your sexual kinks!

In another direction, there is Japanese bondage. With its oriental origins, Japanese bondage is considered by some an art form and if you really get into it you can really create some elaborate patterns. But to start with you probably wont create much in the way of art, but you will have lots of fun.

You may think a bit of old washing line will do the job, but you really cant skimp here. Get Rope intended for the job, or you run the risk of the rope itching and irritating the skin or chafing. If the rope is too thin it cuts into the skin. Considering the delicate places the rope is going to touch - you don't want to be left with Chinese burns from your Japanese bondage!

You can buy Books about Japanese Bondage, but finding out for yourself is a whole lot of fun. Here are some Top Tips -

Double up your length of rope. Using double thickness makes knot tying easier.

Keep everything symmetrical - this makes for a more pleasing creation to the eye, it also makes things a whole lot easier.

Always start with a G-String style formation. Its good for anchorage points and gives you something to build on

To make the G-String With doubled length, wrap around the waist as if it were a belt. Feed the surplus rope through the loop created when you doubled the length. Line up this connecting point with the navel. Pass the rope down and through the legs and up between the buttocks to the middle back of the 'belt' and knot. Now you are ready to go on to the upper body, or pass round to the sides to tie the wrists to the waist. Just let your imagination run riot!

Remember - When practising Japanese bondage do not make the binds too tight, and bare in mind that you will need to be able to untie any knots that you make.

About the Author

S. Roberts writes for http://www.pleasure-toyz.co.uk/ Where Sexperts, give you honest, straight forward answers to your burning questions, So come on in and see how you too can have a better sexual life. Packed with hints and tips of how to find and maintain a fulfilling sexual relationship. If you publish this article please link to http://www.pleasure-toyz.co.uk/ - Thanks!